A few of my short stories that I'd like your opinion on, if you want to give it (critiques more than welcome). Otherwise, please, just enjoy the stories.
:-D Love it. It's amazing how many different paths a word can send the mind down.
How are doing and what are you up to these days? Hope you're well, and happy with life in general. Sorry it's been so long, the blog just goes out of my mind when I'm back home, something that will probably keep on happening for the next year or so :-S. more…
Fire!!. who would have thought that this one simple word word be the prelude to my own demise, i was stupid to think that i could get away with murder....i wonder how long it takes from hearing that word to the bullet hitting yo.......... more…
Thanks, I appreciate it. I'm getting close to the point where I need to write the next bit so it might slow down a bit if I don't get a move on :). more…
I liked it- the whole build up and then the shattering at the end. And Jack- it's not just women ;) men don't always appreciate the effort you put into something special. more…
hmmm interesting one this is...i really like your style. not hard to imagine and easy to place yourself into...:)the description is pretty good, shows you have a keen eye. i didn't quite get the beginning, but then again i was quite distracted when i started the read. good stuff tho...and i want more..:D
I re-read it again as I noted your comments. I missed out a comment. I do like the descriptive imagery. Your words are effective in that sense. :-) more…
That's fair, it is quite emotionally distant I think. Thanks for the feedback. I'll try and make the next one a bit more intense. Nothing quite ready yet though so watch this space :). more…
I have re-read the story again. There is something about it that just does not catch me. Alas, I cannot be more specific. I am not caught into its framework...I know I am being vague but I just cannot pinpoint what it is that does not "catch" me. more…
Not at all...I think it re-enforced the transition or comparisons within life and death. The story is short enough the repetition between Today and "But Yesterday" is not annoying. .......At least it is not to me. more…
I have read and reread the story and enjoy it the way it is currently presented. It is like a Paul Simon song...it is a thinking person's story. Invokes some thought and relfection on what is happening within her world. more…
Did thinking death was there for the young girl work, or would it have been better if it was a parent who had died, leaving the girl a world of tragedy? For you, that is. more…
I liked the story. Not sure if I would revise it....or if you do, then minor ones. Death is there for a reason and I think we are drawn to conclude that he has come for someone. Actually, at first I thought it was for the young girl and she was making him feel better for taking her. more…
I know...when I am reading something that really fascinates me, I am lost in time and content. I think that is why I actually enjoyed working on term papers in university. It was not work to me....except the missing of much needed sleep. more…
Thanks. Can't think that I had much in mind specifically, though it was a little while ago now.
That's fair enough about stuff lingering but I'm glad it helped with the writing.
I'm okay, things ticking by nicely except my general lack of personal time. I find when I have time to do things I'm recharging more than I am act more…
Recent comments (30)
In response to: "90 days later..." 115 days old
by some1else [Member]
:-D Love it. It's amazing how many different paths a word can send the mind down.
How are doing and what are you up to these days? Hope you're well, and happy with life in general. Sorry it's been so long, the blog just goes out of my mind when I'm back home, something that will probably keep on happening for the next year or so :-S. more…
In response to: "90 days later..." 333 days old
by jackfrost Pro
Fire!!. who would have thought that this one simple word word be the prelude to my own demise, i was stupid to think that i could get away with murder....i wonder how long it takes from hearing that word to the bullet hitting yo.......... more…
In response to: "Seven Years Bad Luck - Post 07" 372 days old
by some1else [Member]
Thanks, I appreciate it. I'm getting close to the point where I need to write the next bit so it might slow down a bit if I don't get a move on :). more…
In response to: "Seven Years Bad Luck - Post 07" 372 days old
by kevinwilson Pro
these are good to read.
keep up the good work! more…
In response to: "Seven Years Bad Luck - Post 04" 382 days old
by some1else [Member]
Hopefully there'll be more to come :). more…
In response to: "Seven Years Bad Luck - Post 04" 382 days old
by jackfrost Pro
Cool:) more…
In response to: "Discarded Thoughtfulness" 391 days old
by some1else [Member]
Thanks, and I think I'd agree - and not just to save my own hide :) more…
In response to: "Discarded Thoughtfulness" 391 days old
by MonkeyPie [Member]
I liked it- the whole build up and then the shattering at the end. And Jack- it's not just women ;) men don't always appreciate the effort you put into something special. more…
In response to: "Discarded Thoughtfulness" 391 days old
by some1else [Member]
(sh, don't let anyone else - women, more specifically - hear you say that, we'll be for it) more…
In response to: "Discarded Thoughtfulness" 391 days old
by jackfrost Pro
nice....and thats women for you..fickle:)) more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 438 days old
by the-living-dead [Member]
hmmm interesting one this is...i really like your style. not hard to imagine and easy to place yourself into...:)the description is pretty good, shows you have a keen eye. i didn't quite get the beginning, but then again i was quite distracted when i started the read. good stuff tho...and i want more..:D
cheers mate. :) more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 450 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
I re-read it again as I noted your comments. I missed out a comment. I do like the descriptive imagery. Your words are effective in that sense. :-) more…
In response to: "Today" 453 days old
by some1else [Member]
Glad to hear it, I am quite a fan of repetition, and groups of three for some reason, so sometimes I over do it :). more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 453 days old
by some1else [Member]
That's fair, it is quite emotionally distant I think. Thanks for the feedback. I'll try and make the next one a bit more intense. Nothing quite ready yet though so watch this space :). more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 456 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
I have re-read the story again. There is something about it that just does not catch me. Alas, I cannot be more specific. I am not caught into its framework...I know I am being vague but I just cannot pinpoint what it is that does not "catch" me. more…
In response to: "Today" 463 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
Not at all...I think it re-enforced the transition or comparisons within life and death. The story is short enough the repetition between Today and "But Yesterday" is not annoying. .......At least it is not to me. more…
In response to: "Fairness" 463 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
I have read and reread the story and enjoy it the way it is currently presented. It is like a Paul Simon song...it is a thinking person's story. Invokes some thought and relfection on what is happening within her world. more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 480 days old
by hebburndelboy [Member]
have a great time mate! more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 481 days old
by some1else [Member]
It's kind of you to give it time for pondering. I appreciate all the comments you're giving :yes:, it's always nice to get feedback. more…
In response to: "Fairness" 481 days old
by some1else [Member]
Did thinking death was there for the young girl work, or would it have been better if it was a parent who had died, leaving the girl a world of tragedy? For you, that is. more…
In response to: "Today" 481 days old
by some1else [Member]
Cheers muchly, you didn't feel it was a tad too repetitive? more…
In response to: "Today" 483 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
Well done....very well done. :-) more…
In response to: "Fairness" 483 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
I liked the story. Not sure if I would revise it....or if you do, then minor ones. Death is there for a reason and I think we are drawn to conclude that he has come for someone. Actually, at first I thought it was for the young girl and she was making him feel better for taking her. more…
In response to: "Dark Horse" 483 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
hmmm...I read the story....but I have to think about it for a while before I comment. Mixed feelings here. :-) more…
In response to: "Fairness" 485 days old
by some1else [Member]
Hmm, maybe I should revise it? more…
In response to: "Fairness" 488 days old
by jackfrost Pro
sorry no i thought that death had given the girl a reprieve..sorry! more…
In response to: "Fairness" 489 days old
by some1else [Member]
Did it make it obvious that one of her family just died? more…
In response to: "Fairness" 489 days old
by jackfrost Pro
:)) i like the last line "before returning to her front door and the tragic fairness of life" :yes: more…
In response to: "Meditation and the Death of a Soul" 493 days old
by oldblindog [Member]
I know...when I am reading something that really fascinates me, I am lost in time and content. I think that is why I actually enjoyed working on term papers in university. It was not work to me....except the missing of much needed sleep. more…
In response to: "The Seven Cardinal Cinquains" 495 days old
by some1else [Member]
Thanks. Can't think that I had much in mind specifically, though it was a little while ago now.
That's fair enough about stuff lingering but I'm glad it helped with the writing.
I'm okay, things ticking by nicely except my general lack of personal time. I find when I have time to do things I'm recharging more than I am act more…